Over the last week, I have been travelling tin Norway. Of course, it is always good to be away from the daily stresses of South Africa for a little while. Over the last year in particular, I have felt a heaviness amongst South Africans. It’s no secret that South Africans are experts at being negative and if there is one thing we are good at, it is moaning and complaining about everything wrong in the country. This seems to have reached an all out high over the last while. 

This is in sharp contrast with the Scandinavian countries which – despite being in almost total darkness for many months of the year – have ranked at the top of the World Happiness Index for decades.  South Africa ranked 85th in the 2023 report – which is not great, especially if you take into account that we fall below countries such as Algeria (81st), Vietnam (65th), and the Russian Federation (70th). One bit of good news is that we have improved from our pre-Covid ranking of 106th.

“If there is one thing we are good at, it is moaning and complaining about everything wrong in the country”

While travelling in Scandinavia this has been on my mind and I’ve wondered what would make South Africans a bit happier. Some Scandinavians claim jokingly that their sauna culture plays a big role. This might well be true. In Finland - which topped the latest happiness index – there are 3 million saunas for a population of 5.3 million people. Then again, they don’t have Eskom!

The World Happiness Report gives some clues as to what makes people happy. Unsurprisingly income, healthy life expectancy and of course basic human rights are important to people.

However, one of the most important things is equality –  economic equality in particular.

This would explain why Scandinavians are happy and why the estimated 30 million South Africans who live in poverty are so unhappy. Yet, it doesn’t explain the unhappiness of South Africa’s middle classes, who enjoy a very good quality of life even compared to many Europeans (and most of us do tend to use Europe and America as our yardsticks). It seems to me that a great amount of  South African unhappiness has to do with our feelings about our government. 

The authors of the State of Happiness report identified 5 functions of the state that are primary factors in people’s sense of wellbeing or happiness. The first is a state’s fiscal capacity i.e. to raise or generate money. The second is the ability to deliver services. The third is the capacity to ensure the rule of law and finally of course the capacity to avoid civil war, the avoidance of repression and the ability to deal with corruption. 

With the exception of civil war and repression, our government is currently struggling (to put it mildly) with all of these basic functions, which goes a long way to explaining  the general sense of unhappiness among us.

Worse, it is highly unlikely that this - or any other future government - would be able to solve these problems in the short term. 

So are we then just condemned to eternal unhappiness?

It turns out there is an antidote. 

In 1938 a group of scientists at Harvard University started to track the health and happiness of 268 men (only men were allowed into Harvard at that stage so they only included women later). They tracked the participants for over eighty years, following their career trajectories, their broader lives as well as successes and failures in their careers, life and relationships.  Their conclusions were most interesting.

They found that the most important factor in how happy people are as well as how healthy they remain, is how happy they are in relationships. The study revealed that close relationships are what make and keep people happy – far more so than fame and money. 

(Just as an aside, recent research has indicated that whilst men are happier and do better in marriage, women are generally happier and healthier single, but I’ll keep that for another column...) 

The point is that when we engage positively with others, we are happier and our health improves. It seems that research has now proven the Chinese proverb that claims: “If you want to be happy for an hour, take a nap. If you want to be happy for a day, go fishing. If you want to be happy for a year, inherit a fortune. If you want to be happy for your whole life, help someone.”

It is well known that acts of altruism and kindness release endorphins in the brain, which make people happier. It of course also makes the recipient happier. Most importantly it forms relationships and a sense of community and belonging, both extremely important for our wellbeing. In South Africa in particular where there is so much mistrust and fear of the other, plain “other-love” and caring could make a massive difference to our overall happiness. 

So, it seems that while we are waiting for the government to get their act together, we can increase our own sense of happiness by working on our close relationships and offering a helping hand to those who have so much less than we do. 

And yes, if there is a sauna somewhere – it might just help as well. 

Just as an aside: after being away from the country for a little while, I am always reminded that the grass is after all not greener on the other side - and that I am already looking forward to coming home.